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September

Dear September,

So if July and August were about holding on to what is most precious in my life, I suppose you must be about letting go of what is not.

Here is my truth. I attempt it but I find it too big of a goal, too vague of a directive. What have I brought that I did not have to bring? What did I ally myself with that I did not need to ally myself with? Who am I holding on to, who is not holding on to me?

I ask myself these questions and I am faced with the silence of indecision. I feel for my way out but I don’t know whether to lead with my heart or my head.

September you are often the third and final opportunity for a new start, allied as you are with new school semesters. But even this, which usually fills me with reassurance, fills me with trepidation.

This year, the world around me seems to mirror my confusion.

What if the lesson of you, is to sit in the confusion. Is to remember that I am not the orchestrator of my life, or of the world around me.

Until next time,

Yours,

Naliaka.O

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